Writing part I of my 10 Years Later reflections was so easy. Talking about my experience of leaving Utah felt like a natural flow. Trying to encompass everything of actually living in Switzerland? Not so easy. I’ve literally spent the last 4 days trying to write part II and 14 revisions later, I realised it’s just not going to happen. I thought typing away my feelings would help clear my thoughts, but it only showed me how overfilled the last 10 years really were and how I still haven’t processed it all. Maybe next year.
A few days ago, Toby and I walked down memory lane and recreated the same pictures we took on my first real day in Switzerland. As we sat overlooking a view of Uster, I closed my eyes and tried to picture the young Pamela that had once arrived with big eyes not knowing all of the adventures and lessons ahead of her. Knowing everything I know today I felt a pang of sadness for that young Pamela because I still have flashes of how bleak everything once felt. It would be so nice to go back in time and tell my younger self that one day I will fly from Utah to Switzerland and I will look at the flight map heading East and think: Time to go home! Back to my life, back to my Swiss people.
